I’m learning to sail. Everyone keeps saying,

“But I thought you worked on a boat.”

Yes I worked on a motor-yacht and I specialized in setting the table, making beds, laundry and some line handling. I forget every knot I learned how to make. Although I can still fold toilet paper into really pretty shapes.

Captain’s dad just got a new sailboat. It’s big. It has two berths and two heads. Captain’s dad needs help to sail it and that does not mean folding the two rolls of toilet paper. I’m running around the boat trying to learn how to sail. Captain is off crutches, but he is still not an able-bodied seaman. He’s very good at holding the snacks.

Captain’s dad is now also being referred to as Captain, which makes everything that much more confusing. My Captain is not happy about the nickname. I offer,

“I can think of another name for you.”

“No. It was mine first.”

Okay.

My Captain says that his dad should be amenable to Admiral. It is a promotion.

So I’m running around the boat learning to sail. Meanwhile Captain’s mom is on the lookout for anything we might be about to run over. She shouts,

“Lobster pot!”

“Where?”

“Over there!”

“Starboard?”

“Which one is starboard?”

“The right.”

“And which one is the left?”

The lobster pot is forgotten as we descend into a boating terminology discussion.

Every time we tack, I’m in charge of feeding the lines out. Sometimes it goes smoother than others. Captain’s dad shouts,

“That was great tack!”

I give myself an imaginary pat on the back. The next time, Captain’s dad declares,

“Oh that was a bad tack.”

I’m pretty sure there was a lull in the wind.

At the end of the day we head up to the yacht club for a drink. We sit down just in time to catch the horse race. Is this really happening? I turn to Captain,

“The only way this day could be any preppier is if we had played tennis this morning.”

My Captain 😉