It’s time to let my mustache grow out

Here I’ve been, living my life, thinking mustaches are creepy. I go to a lot of work to keep mine under control. At some point they became trendy.

I know this because I showed up at Captain’s brother’s house and their four-year old was wearing a mustache sweater. No not a sweater made from mustaches, a sweater with a giant mustache on it. I remark,

“Nice mustache sweater.”

His mom replies,

“He saw it in the store and had to have it. He loves anything to do with mustaches.”


There’s a Santa figurine on the table. I tell the four-year old,

“I like your Santa.”

“He has a mustache.”

I thought all Santas had mustaches, but it turns out all Santas have beards, but not all have mustaches. If you’re four and/or if you have a mustache obsession, you notice this.

I remark to a coworker,

“Did you know that mustaches are trendy?”

“Yeah, my ten-year old nephew is really into them. He wears a mustache necklace.”

I gave my little sister a bunch of suspenders for Christmas. Also another trend I just clued into. She holds up one pair and squeals,

“It has mustaches on it!”

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