vacation | Good Times with Jess

And so we’re home. For now. I leave for Croatia in three weeks. By myself. For work.

I need to go: hiking, biking, kayaking, white-water rafting, oyster sampling, private yacht chartering, horseback riding, so that I’ll be able to advise you on the best Croatian trip possible.

I’m leaving my babies behind. These are the sacrifices I must make.

It is bittersweet. I would love to do this adventure with my whole family. Someday we can. BUT in the meantime, I’ll bring them back some candy.

RB loves candy. She’s been counting her future Easter eggs ever since her Halloween candy ran out months ago.

BB will not be so easily won over, but there must be a Croatian stuffy to be had.

As for Captain, my gift to him will be my return. He’s concerned I’m not going to survive white-water rafting. He insisted on travel insurance so there will be funds for the repatriation of my body.

The fact that I’ve gone white-water rafting before and in higher-class rapids, does not seem to reassure him.

I also went white-water boogie boarding and again, here I am.

I’m a luxury travel advisor, but when encouraged to pick a specialization, I created: “Luxury Adventure Specialist.”

Captain agreed that that was a good fit for me.

I’m not sure what it means, but it sure sounds like someone who stays in 5-star hotels and goes white-water rafting.

That can be you too. Or luxury hotels and yoga. Or luxury hotels and a safari. The adventure options are really endless.

I just applied for a trip that’s 5-star hotels and skiing. Keeping my adventure options open.

That required a two-minute video application. I emerged from my room after an hour of filming myself.

Feeling ridiculous and self-conscious I checked in with Captain,

“I finished my video application.”

“Oh you did?”

“You didn’t hear me?!”

“No! I thought you were in a meeting.”

A meeting with myself where I say the same thing over and over again, hoping somehow that the millionth try will be acceptable to whatever nebulous standard I’m holding myself to.

It is done and sent off. With any luck I’ll add Austria to my list of upcoming adventures, after Sardinia this September.

Good times with Jess and sometimes her family, but not always.

New Zealand: I’m middle left, very alive

I locked my children outside.

The good news about our deck stairs being unfinished is that there’s a baby gate blocking them at the top. It has turned our deck into a giant, outdoor playpen.

The kids went out. I locked the screen door and I’m enjoying my coffee in peace. That’s how school vacation week is going.

It started with our Passover seder. Considering 2.5-year-old RB refuses to sit through a regular family dinner, I knew we were doomed.

She sat for longer than I expected, however long it took her to drink the prescribed 4 glasses of grape juice.

At which point she slipped out of her chair. She was quiet, happy and BB didn’t make any moves to follow her. We continued to read from our picture book Haggadah, which somehow still manages to feel like it’s really long.

RB let herself out onto the deck and was doing who knows what. She reappeared, pressing her face against the screen door, shouting,

“Happy Passover guys!”

Happy Passover!

BB found the afikomen, while RB read a book and said,

“Where’s the komen?”

I gave BB a five dollar bill and gave two ones to RB. BB was crestfallen. I offered to trade her three one dollar bills for her five and she couldn’t have been happier.

Having saved two dollars, Passover was officially a success and we rolled right into Easter. RB again had zero interest in hunting for hidden things.

BB was hyper focused on finding all the eggs, but had little interest in the candy inside. RB sat in the pile of eggs BB brought her and mainlined jelly beans. They may make a good pair after all.

Now one child is napping and the other one is washing my car, or the bottom half of it.

I call the Alaska railroad. I’m hoping to upgrade our train tickets to Denali. There are two service levels: goldstar and adventure class. Adventure class was all that was available when I booked, but a couple goldstar tickets appeared yesterday.

The woman on the phone reminds me that the seats are not interchangeable. If BB is in goldstar, she can visit adventure class, but if RB is in adventure class she can’t go to goldstar.

The woman asks,

“So who are the two staying in adventure class?”

I pause long enough that she feels compelled to add,

“You can’t leave the two kids there by themselves.”

Well good to know I wasn’t the only one considering that.

Captain is facing a new requirement of 3 days a month in the office. If he’s to be believed, it may be the end of him. I’m not convinced.

The idea that there may be a time in the future when I’m home alone, feels so improbable that I can’t write any more about it.

Vacation week also seemed like a good time to test out RB’s new ipad. It was a success. She entered zombie mode.

There is hope for our trip and anyone else stuck in adventure class with my kids.