After collecting everyone’s Thanksgiving stories, I have a winner:

A regular I haven’t seen in awhile comes in. I ask him,

“Did you go home for Thanksgiving?”

“No, we went to my boyfriend’s family and all his extended family.”

“How was that?”

“He came out to his Grandmother the day before.”

“Oh dear.”

“She’s crotchety in general, but that made her a even more crotchety.”

“I bet.”

“And that’s not even the worst part. My boyfriend and I were in charge of bringing the turkey. I was really excited to cook it and I brined it in molasses and sauce for three days before.”

“That sounds great.”

“Everyone really liked it, but there was something odd about it too. There was a weird floral scent.”

“Oh no.”

“When my boyfriend and I got home, we realized that the bag we’d used to brine the turkey was a Febreze scented trash bag.”