Almost arrested, not quite

SNOW! And that’s an understatement.

It is now safe to say that I have survived the snowstorm despite not bum-rushing the grocery store and the gas station Thursday.

Okay so Thursday night, after I got off work at 2:30AM, I decided it would be nice to have half-n-half for my coffee so I went to the store.

I go to Shaw’s at 2AM all the time and usually it’s me, the guys stocking the shelves and some random guy with a parakeet on his shoulder. I swear. This time it was still crowded, there were at least 20 shoppers. The store looked like impending doom. Shelves were empty. Food and trash were all over the floor. Will there be any half-n-half? There is. I grab it and think,

‘Is this all I really need?’ Everyone else is stocking up, maybe I should be stocking up too. But I don’t know what else I would get. I already have enough cookie dough for a week. I head to the check out line with my half-n-half.

I get in line behind a middle-aged white guy with a huge goatee and a belly. He turns around. I see a uniform poking out from under his coat. It says “SPD.” Hmm. Is he a cop? I don’t see handcuffs. He points at my half-n-half,

“That’s all you could think to get for the storm?”

“I tried to think of something else!”

He ushers me ahead of him,

“You only have one thing, go ahead.”

He only has a few things: several vegan meals. I remark,

“You don’t have much either.”

“Yeah just what I’m going to eat tonight while I’m working.”

When someone says vegan, I do not think of a cop with a belly. Only in Camberville. (Cambridge/Somerville because I know my mom is going to text me and ask “What’s Camberville?”)

I take my half-n-half, say farewell to the cop and head home. I’ve got a half-mile walk home and then it’s a three day weekend. Yeah snow day. Two minutes later a huge Somerville Police SUV pulls up along side me. The guy with the goatee pops his head out,

“Do you want a ride?”

“Yeah I do!”

I’m so excited! I don’t know when the last time was you were in a cop car, but for me, never! I hop in the front. There are so many gadgets. I resist the urge to start pressing buttons. I want to call headquarters. He tells me,

“I don’t like women walking home at this time of night.”

“Yeah, I guess you know better about that than I do. But I do this walk a lot.” I tell him what bar I work at.

“That’s where I know you from! I thought you looked familiar and figured it must be from yoga.”

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