I would like a dress that doesn’t require an army to help me pee

I don’t know when the last time you tried to plan a wedding is, but there’s a lot to do before we get to enjoy the open bar.

I head in for my normal 2 hour hair cut. A luxury that I love every minute of. Last time I saw my hairdresser she said,

“Next time I see you you’re going to have a ring.”

I wasn’t so sure, we were still months away from the final diamond spreadsheet. But it turned out to be true. I show her my hand. She squeals and we start talking plans. She recently got married and she tells me what dress store not to go to. She warns me,

“My dress came and it didn’t fit. They tried to force me to pay for it. My lawyer got me out of it.”

“Lawyer?!”

“It was a $12,000 dress.”

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