It’s that time of year again when I marvel at the enormous amount of Hanukkah decor I’ve accumulated and I don’t add anything else. NOT ONE THING.
JUST KIDDING. Home Goods had a giant, metal, light up sign, as tall as my children, with arrows showing you what direction Hanukkah is. It’s HERE!
If I jumped the shark four years ago when I purchased traditional Hanukkah gnomes. I don’t know what I’ve done now, considering this decoration doesn’t even fit in our storage bins
Tutu, our elf on the shelf is back, she had a baby. Which surprised all of us.
I bought a tiny American Girl doll elf, intending to give it as a gift Christmas Day/Hanukkah night. The tiny elf is so CUTE. I couldn’t resist it coming out sooner.
What I didn’t anticipate was that this would send RB down the rabbit hole of how babies are made and more specifically, how elf babies are made.
Things in the Land of Make Believe have deteriorated. I’m not sure who believes what at this point and I’m about ready to wave the white flag or one of my 37 Hanukkah dish towels.
I would like to tell you I did not buy another one this year, but that would be a lie.
RB (my 5-year old) has come down every morning and interrogated me.
A few weeks ago, before our elf appeared, she stared deep into my soul and asked,
“Is the Easter Bunny real or are you the Easter Bunny?”
“What do you think?”
“I think it’s you.”
“Ah.”
She does not like this non answer. She presses her nose against mine and yells
“TELL ME THE TRUTH!”
I cannot hold up to these interrogation techniques. I whimper,
“It’s me.”
“I KNEW IT!”
At which point BB (8-years old) joined us and I thought RB would tell all. RB didn’t say a word.
Then Tutu our elf appeared. BB reminded RB not to touch her or else that would ruin her magic. BB ran around writing notes to Tutu, making her jewelry and when I wasn’t home, putting out a charcuterie board with cheese for her.
Why Captain thought that was a good idea I DO NOT KNOW.
The next morning RB pressed her face against mine and yelled,
“Is Tutu magic or DID YOU BUY HER AT THE STORE?”
“What do you think?”
“I think she’s real and pretend.”
“Sounds about right.”
No one should have to deal with the 7am pre-breakfast wrath of RB. (Who may be hard of hearing, so we’ll give her a small benefit of doubt with the yelling.) She locks eyes with me, staring deep beyond my soul again and shouts,
“DID YOU BUY TUTU AT THE STORE?!! TELL ME THE TRUTH!”
“Yes, I did.”
“I knew it.”
Again BB joined us and I was sure RB would tell her the new information. RB didn’t say a word. Not only did RB not say a word, but she continued to join BB in talking to Tutu and relaying messages for Santa.
Then two nights ago RB lost her first tooth! She accepted her money and hasn’t asked a single question about the toothfairy.
This morning, in what has continued to be my 7am torture session, RB asked,
“Does Santa really bring presents or is it you and Dad?”
Months ago I told both kids,
“This year, because the first night of Hanukkah is the same day as Christmas, we’re not going to do any Christmas presents. We’ll just do Hanukkah presents.”
BB said,
“That’s ok, because Santa will still bring us something.”
And so Santa set aside one gift for Christmas, because as you may have guessed, I have a strong affinity for Hanukkah.
This morning, RB wouldn’t even give me her usual good morning hug, kiss and snuggle. She demanded answers about Santa. I asked,
“What do you think?”
“I think it’s you and dad.”
“Yeah.”
“IS IT?!? TELL ME THE TRUTH!!!”
“Yes, it’s Dad and me.”
BB told me recently that a friend had told her and RB that the Easter Bunny wasn’t real. I asked BB,
“What do you think?”
“She made those muddy footprints in our living room one year!”
“That’s true. I think the Easter Bunny is like a unicorn. You can believe in them if you want.”
“Unicorns aren’t real.”
“Right.”
“The Easter Bunny is.”
So I think we’re in the land of BB wanting to believe. And I’m not sure what land RB is in. She believes and doesn’t believe and hasn’t said a word to BB about any of it.
To put this all over the absolute top. BB came home from Hebrew school this week and asked,
“Why don’t we have a Mensch on the Bench?”
“I don’t know. We have two elves. Isn’t that enough?”
“But the Mensch on the Bench is for Hanukkah.”
“Is the Mensch on the Bench magic?”
This is a huge question of mine. The whole elf on the shelf thing goes along with Santa and all that make believe. BB ponders the Mensch magic dilemma and replies,
“Maybe?”
Our Mensch on the Bench is facing a shipping delay from whichever magical place with tariffs he’s coming from, but he should be here December 20th.
I asked my fellow Jewish yoga buddy,
“I don’t know what I’m doing with the Mensch, is he magic? Where does he go every night? Not back to the North Pole.”
“Jerusalem!”
Of course he does. Please give a warm welcome to our future Mensch and the last bit of Hanukkah decor I will buy. Until next week.
Good Times with Jess 